It’s Christmas time…and I’m still trying to find my happy inner child. I go through these phases…sometimes I’m elated as I smell the crisp fresh air tinged with woodsmoke and see the twinkling decorations through my neighbors living room windows. Other times I feel like I’m carrying around a dead weight in my heart and wish I could just lie in bed all day. I’ll admit it, 2012 was NOT a year I’d care to re-live or experience over in any way and I welcome the New Year with open arms- albeit a tad hesitantly.
I lost a very special friend this month; the most constant relationship of the past 12 years of my life. Anyone who has ever met him has never forgotten him, and the impression he made was lasting to say the least. Aslan was more than a cat; he was my little faithful buddy who traveled across Canada with me 2 times, lived in countless cities and saw me through many a rough patch in our time together. He was an extremely vocal and spirited little brat of a cat who stole my heart from the moment I laid eyes on him at the Calgary SPCA almost 13 years ago.
I see people having to make this decision every day of my work life…I see the struggle, the “what if’s” and the self-doubt that clouds their judgement. I felt it all that day I discussed with the doctor how he hadn’t made progress like we’d hoped, that the mass was bigger and that he was uncomfortable. I didn’t want to let him go but I also knew I had no choice. This is something we can do for our animals; our faithful friends, that we can’t do for our human loved ones in pain. Not a day goes by where I don’t miss his presence and I’m ever thankful I have little Ben here to give extra hugs to…
We both miss him.
Unfortunately this one more little thing that 2012 has going against it…I’m trying to feel the joy of the season. I have friends who care about me and love me, I have amazing co-workers who support me in all I attempt…life isn’t bad. It’s not. Its just time to start NEW.
Bring on 2013 I say. I hope it comes in with a bang. The Year of Chere Michelle.